8 Common Grand Junction Attire Stereotypes You’ve Probably Seen

Any and every town has common looks and groups that people tend to gravitate toward. That’s not to say that individuality doesn’t exist, it most certainly does; however, these are some common core looks that seem to exist in Grand Junction. There’s no way I could get every single one, but this is a pretty solid general group of the common looks you can find here.

The “I’ll take a Venti, White Chocolate Mocha” (Mini Skirt and Uggs)

These ladies can tell you all about the social injustices of the world, and the latest episode of Broke Girls and Keeping Up With The Kardashians. They can tell you about the trending vegan blogs, and encourage you to spend less time on social media.

The “I’m Bailing Hay at Noon, but Going To a Concert at seven” (Cowboy Boots and Shorts)

These people work hard, but the play harder. You can usually find them at Country Jam, wearing American Flag Shorts, passed out drunk in a kiddy pool. They could carry on a conversation about the current economical situation, or how they are preparing for the zombie apocalypse.

The “I Can’t Wear That Shirt, It Didn’t Cost $100” (Button Ups and Jeans from The Buckle)

These people need you to know that they are important, and people know who they are. They cant wear a button up without a fancy insignia on the back, and their jeans have studs on the butt cheeks (dudes too, no joke). I’m just guessing, but they probably cant go out into public without at least a 15 minute primping, just fair warning.

The “Wanna Play Some Frolf?”  (Hawaiian Shirt And Tevas)

These guys can tell you all about the latest Hemp Foods, and about their political heroes. You can probably find them at Roasted, at some point during just about any day. If you can discuss any of the awkward regional Indie bands, you’ll be their best friend.

The “I Could Totally Take That Guy” (Tap Out T Shirt and DCs)

This one doesn’t really need much of an explanation. If these guys could learn to compensate for their insecurities with education, they would be far better off. They generally wear some form of MMA logo shirt, and want you to know how tough they are. They probably drive a truck, but not necessarily.

The “I’m Dealing at 1, but have a hot date at 5” (Fancy Dress and Tattered Converse)

These girls look as innocent as the girl next door, but don’t be fooled, they are most definitely not as innocent as they look. They probably attending catholic school, and had to get good at hiding their darker side. On the bright side, she’ll make a great date, so put on your A game with her, just don’t buy the innocent act. Oh, and good luck…

The “I Just Won A Shopping Spree At Wal Mart” (Skin Tight Spandex and a T Shirt…or Pajamas…or a Tweetie Onesie)

Go to peopleofwalmart.com, it will all make sense.

The “I’m Not A Doctor, But I Can Ride A Mountain Bike” (Matching Biking Spandex Suit and Helmet)

First of all, these guys are very important, and awesome, like really really awesome, ok…it’s important to them that you know that. They have a matching helmet to their spandex biking outfit, and their bike probably matches the color scheme as well. Even their awesomeness matches their color scheme. Ok but for real, not all of these guys are terrible, but I’m telling you that you probably won’t enjoy any conversation you could start with them. Just let them do their thing, and do your own thing. Oh, did I mention they are awesome?

If you wanted to categorize me into a look, it would be the “I spend all of my money on my creative media jobs, so I wear t shirts I owned in high school” group. If you can think of some other common Grand Junction looks, leave them in the comments!