Charles Bramesco
Chloe Grace Moretz ‘Appalled’ at Trailer Featuring Snow White Body Shaming
When the Cannes Film Festival descends on the French Rivieira, movie billboards and banners crop up all around the Croisette area to catch the attention of industry big shots in town. One such poster advertised a little film called Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs, a new animated project out of Korea in which Chloe Grace Moretz voices the apple-eater of note Snow White. But the passersby at the festival were none too pleased with the advertisement, see if you can guess why: it displays two Snow Whites, one thin and tall, the other shorter and a bit plumper. The tagline? “What if Snow White was no longer beautiful and the 7 Dwarfs not so short?”
Fix a Marmalade Sandwich and Enjoy the ‘Paddington 2’ Trailer
The Pooh-Paddington War will continue into perpetuity, as the public rages over which accident-prone storytime bear is the cuter and more lovable character. But the Paddington side just got a strong swell of support — the newly unveiled trailer for the marmalade-loving Brit’s sequel film has been unveiled, and Paddington turns the sweet-and-simple cuteness up to whatever 10 is in Britain’s number system. Do they use a base 10 number system? We have no way of knowing. But what we do know is that Paddington will get his little bear foot stuck in a bucket, and then a second bucket will fall on his head! Two for the matinee, please!
George A. Romero Readying Another ‘Living Dead’ Zombie Movie
George A. Romero has fully laid claim to the dominion of all things Dead — whether that’s Night of the Living, Dawn of the, Day of the, Land of the, Diary of the, or Survival of the. The elder statesman of horror cinema has no intention of resting on his laurels, however. Perhaps riding the wave of renewed interest in Night of the Living Dead that accompanied its gorgeous restoration last year, Romero has announced plans for a new addition to the ever-expanding of the Dead universe. And it looks like his new breed of zombies have a need for speed.
Jackie Chan and Sylvester Stallone Will Fight the Terrorists in ‘Ex-Baghdad’
Martial arts expert and outspoken proponent of condom usage Jackie Chan is at it again, raring and ready to kick some enemy buttock even as he ages into his mid-sixties. The actor has kept up a steady stream of feature work (only some of which requires him to play chauffeur to a real live lion) and is currently preparing to re-mount his his kids’ cartoon series The Jackie Chan Adventures, but ever the work-horse, Chan’s just announced another new project. And what’s more, his next mission will pair him with a partner all too familiar to Eastern and Western audiences alike.
Martin Scorsese’s Next Gangster Film Will Be a Different Beast Than ‘Goodfellas’
See a few of his movies, and you’ll start to recognize the Martin Scorsese style: quick zooms and jump cuts cribbed from the French New Wave, exhilarating tracking shots, the occasional expertly-deployed pop hit, brief breaks from reality straight out of Powell & Pressburger’s playbook. He’s forged an entire career out of synthesizing influences and making their techniques his own, but even as he’s established himself as one of the most distinctive auteurs currently working, he’s never gotten mired in his own aesthetic. He constantly challenges himself to try more (if you need proof, just look at Silence), and in a new interview, he confirms that he’s going for something different with his next picture.
Snap Your Elastic Waistband In Time With Weird Al’s ‘Captain Underpants’ Theme Song
Serious question: does any single entertainer have such complete dominion over their chosen field as Weird Al Yankovic wields over the song parody? Skeptics may scoff that musical spoofery is a stupid thing to become really, really, virtuosically good at, but the point stands that Yankovic has completely and totally mastered his preferred art form. So when the producers behind the upcoming film adaptation of the Captain Underpants chapter book series needed to find a talent for their theme music, of course their choice was obvious. In no insignificant way, Weird Al Yankovic was born to write a peppy pop tune about tightened-whiteys.
Scientists Name New Species of Dinosaur After Zuul of ‘Ghostbusters’
We owe a lot to scientists — they cured polio, got us on the moon, and they‘re doing their darnedest to stop us from methodically killing the planet. But man, what a bunch of nerds. It seems like every time biologists discover a new species of animal and need to give it a name, they take the opportunity to bust out a reference to their favorite bit of geek-approved pop culture. Lest we forget the velvet worm named after My Neighbor Totoro, and we’d be remiss to overlook the euglossa bazinga, a rare bee with a Big Bang Theory catchphrase as its namesake. And it appears that now the nerds are at it again.
Kirsten Dunst Gets High in the Forest in the Dreamy ‘Woodshock’ Trailer
Step aside, Tom Ford, another scion of a vast fashion empire has deigned to make the jump into feature directing. Or rather, a pair — designers Kate and Laura Mulleavy, better known as the sister-creators of the haute couture label Rodarte, want to flex their artistic muscles a little more than the occasional fashion show can allow. Boutique distributor A24 was all too happy to accommodate the young visionaries, and will front their debut Woodshock for a premiere on September 15 of this year. This project has been an intriguing enigma for some time now, but between the striking poster released yesterday and this morning’s dreamy, beguiling new trailer, we’re getting a first look at one of this fall’s most intriguing new offerings.
Johnny Depp Makes Surprise Appearance on ‘Pirates’ Ride at Disneyland
Johnny Depp needs some public image rehabilitation, and badly. When it came out last year that he had physically abused former spouse Amber Heard, a dark and sickly pallor was cast over the heretofore beloved actor’s profile. It isn’t helping that he hasn’t been in a good movie since 2011 (Rango, though Verbinski’s follow-up The Lone Ranger has its supporters), and hasn’t been in a really profitable one since 2014’s Into the Woods. The guy has to save a little face if he wants to secure his future in this business, and what better way to do that than to play to the only demographic unaware of his unsavory personal life: the youth!
Netflix Is Willing to Release Original Movies Into Theaters, But Only After They’re on Netflix
Yesterday, Indiewire film critic David Ehrlich ran an illuminating essay on Netflix’s testy relationship with the original films it releases, explaining how their model of bypassing theatrical release and going straight to streaming ultimately degrades the viewing experience and makes the movies harder to find and appreciate. (This comes hot on the heels of an official denunciation from the Federation of French Cinemas against the Cannes Film Festival for allowing TV into their lineup for the first time ever.) Clearly, his words went straight to the top of Netflix’s corporate office, as the online video giant has issued a letter to their shareholders assuring them that everything’s going to be fine and movies aren’t dead, probably.